Nagging Wives

Oct. 21

Read: Genesis 28:1-9

Nagging Wives

“When Esau was forty years old, he took Judith the daughter of Beeri the Hittite to be his wife, and Basemath the daughter of Elon the Hittite, and they made life bitter for Isaac and Rebekah… Then Rebekah said to Isaac, “I loathe my life because of the Hittite women. If Jacob marries one of the Hittite women like these, one of the women of the land, what good will my life be to me?” (Gen. 26:34, 27:46)

There is no life in being “married to” anyone or anything that is opposed to God. While it might seem like a good idea at the time, to be joined to anything that is opposed to the Lord is going to make your life miserable as well as the lives of those around you. Take a look at Esau here. Esau had some marriage problems… big time. I don’t know exactly what was going on; but Esau’s Hittite wives made life “bitter for Isaac and Rebekah”. My hunch is that Isaac and Rebekah didn’t approve of these marriages from the get-go. It is my guess, but I bet Esau’s marriage to these Hittites was an act of rebellion.

Rebekah (Esau’s mother) says that she “loathes her life” because of her daughter in-laws. How bad are these women? I mean, those are some pretty strong descriptions! The Hittites were descendants of Heth, the son of Canaan, and great grandson of Noah. Canaan was under a curse from Noah as the result of his father’s sin against Noah. Ham - Canaan’s dad - had rejected God’s blessing and instruction and rebelled against God’s ways. He took advantage of Noah while he was sleeping. This showed Ham’s true allegiance / alignment was not with God but rather in rebellion against him. Ham’s actions were more inline with the demonic culture that God had just wiped out in a flood than they were with the new start God was launching through Noah and his family. This is the root and origin of the Hittites. It is no surprise that they are bitterly against Isaac and Rebekah. It is also no surprise that Esau would take them as wives.

When Esau overhears his father’s conversation with Jacob, he hatches a plan of his own. Look at verses 6-9 again:

“Now Esau saw that Isaac had blessed Jacob and sent him away to Paddan-aram to take a wife from there, and that as he blessed him he directed him, “You must not take a wife from the Canaanite women,” and that Jacob had obeyed his father and his mother and gone to Paddan-aram. So when Esau saw that the Canaanite women did not please Isaac his father, Esau went to Ishmael and took as his wife, besides the wives he had, Mahalath the daughter of Ishmael, Abraham's son, the sister of Nebaioth.”

Remember how hungry Esau was for a blessing? (cf. Gen 27:34-40) When he hears this exchange and realizes there were blessings involved, he decides he is going to add a non-Canaanite woman to his harem. Esau is trying to mimic Jacob’s behavior - his obedience to Isaac - hoping that it will result in a blessing for him as well. But there is one major flaw here: Esau simply tries to “add to” his life something “pleasing to his father”. Adding something “good” or “pleasing to your father” while continuing to hold onto what is “bitter” or “opposed to” you father will never truly work. There is no blessing to be had for this. Mimicking someone else’s good example while continuing on in other parts of your life with evil is never going to lead to the life / blessing you are longing for. It also does not bring glory to your “father”… neither your proverbial earthly father / that person you are aiming to please nor your heavenly Father above.

We cannot remain linked to… married to… our sin. We must not seek to continue holding on to what is opposed to our heavenly father while simply adding to the mix something that is pleasing. This is not the Christian journey. Life in Christ comes when we let go of our old self and are made new in Christ; when we surrender those fleshly things that are bitter towards God and then receive life in Christ. (Cf. Gal. 2:20) It is a “taking off of the old self” and a “putting on of the new self”. (cf. Eph. 4:24, Col. 3:1,10) It does no good to add something “good” while continuing to hold onto two other things that are “bad”. We see this with Esau adding a non-Canaanite wife to the mix alongside his other Hittite wives. This just does not work. It is not enough to simply “copy Jacob” so to speak.

This is what is so exciting about life in Christ. Jesus takes from us our sin, our brokenness, our poor decisions when we come to him. He is willing to remove what stands between us and the blessing of relationship with the Father, Son, and Spirit. In Christ, we truly receive a blessing. In Christ, it is not simply something being added to us… it is also some things being taken away! Jesus is not just trying to add some spirituality / “Christianity” to our lives, he is transforming us and removing our sin from us. We don’t just try to copy Jesus… he is literally making us like himself! (cf. 2 Cor. 3:16-18) We are being made into the image and likeness of Jesus himself. Christ is offering to us something that was unavailable to Esau- Jesus is sharing his blessing with us in a way that Jacob could not with Esau! Jesus is welcoming us in… he is sharing with us HIS birthright! Stop trying to mimic someone else’s spirituality. Let go of those things which are “bitter towards” your heavenly father. The equation is not simply adding a little Jesus into your old fleshly life… it is a surrender and replacement. This is part of the “good-news” offered in Christ. This is the gospel. You don’t have to just eavesdrop on your heavenly Father’s conversation with others, and then half-heartedly copy what they do - unlike Esaus with Isaac - there is blessing and birthright to be had for you IN CHRIST! Love you guys! - JDP